The other day, I got my face made up by an indie, female makeup artist. The theme of the look was ‘natural makeup. But, in all honesty, the result was nowhere near natural… well, more about that later.
Before the process began, the girl (who was the makeup artist. A really nice one, btw) was eating a piece of gorengan with her hands. I thought that she was gonna wash her hands or wipe them using a wet wipe or something before doing my makeup, but I believe she didn’t. Actually, I wasn’t sure. Although she maybe did wipe her hands, but I just didn’t see it. This was such a big deal for me because I’ll always make sure that my hands are clean before I put my own or anyone else’s makeup. It’s called being respectful. There’s a reason why seeing others who do not wash their hands after using the toilet is my biggest pet peeve. Ask my closest friends, I’m that one friend who ALWAYS reminds them to wash their hands every time they get out of the toilet! #trivia
Anyways, after making peace with the fact that this person was not as sanitary as I thought she would be, she began priming my face then applying some foundation into my face using a brush. To further blend the product into my skin, she used a pink makeup sponge (the one that resembles the shape of a poop. I hope you can clearly picture that on your mind) and pat it all over my face. Now, here were the things that irritated me the most:
A. She did not wet the sponge. To blend foundation with a sponge, it needs to be dampen first. And…
B. THERE WAS A FOUNDATION STAIN ON IT.
What a real poop. Can you imagine how I felt back then? I remained silent tho (but inside, I was screaming). I also saw that the sponge was stored inside a plastic container which also houses other sponges that only God knew how long they hadn’t been cleaned. It then made me think, “How often does she clean her brushes? Does she ever clean those before using them on her clients?” :/
Now, let’s talk brows. She asked me whether or not she can shave some stray brow hairs. I thought “HELLLL TO THE NO”. I told her to keep them that way. Beside, who knew whether or not the shaving tool had been cleaned in advance? And the only peeps I trust to groom my brows are the ladies at Browhaus (they’re simply the best). Anyhoo, she ended up concealing the stray hairs with some foundation and lash glue (would Lisa Eldridge do the same thing?), and filling in my brows using a brow kit from NYX. The shade that she used was definitely lighter that my natural hair color. I mean, I get that when you have dark hair color, theoretically you should fill in your brows using a shade that is a bit lighter than your natural hair color. But this one was just waaaay too light, you’d be able tell that my brows weren’t natural-looking.
After that, she put some eye shadows and it was time for strip lashes. First, she added some glue to the lash band, as per normal. Then, she used this long, wooden stick that had a pointy sharp edge similar to that of a toothpick to spread the glue along the lash band. Using her fingers, she carefully placed the each of the falsies. Next, she positioned the part of the band which didn’t stick to the inner lash line using that pointy wooded stick.
CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW TERRIFYING IT WAS? WOULD LISA ELDRIDGE DO SUCH THING?
She then told me that she wanted to put some mascara on. I automatically looked downward because Lisa would want me to do that. But that girl was no Lisa. She told me to look straight ahead. Afterward, she put another pair of faux eye lashes (so in total I wore 4 falsies) and repeat the whole wooden thing process. Thank God I my eyes didn’t get poked!
Next, she contoured my schnoz, put some blusher on my cheeks, and finally some lippies. She used one of the NYX Soft Matte Lip Creams which came in a plastic tube and applied the product directly on my lips using the doe-foot applicator. Like… seriously… okay. It was way too nude for my complexion, so she decided to add some darker color on top of it. This time, the product came in a palette, so she had to paint my lips using a lip brush, right? I’m sure, by now, you’ve already pictured how the lip brush would look like J
Finally, the makeup was complete. Like I said earlier, it didn’t look anything natural. Well, at least for me. When someone said ‘natural makeup’, I’ll never picture unrealistic brows and stacks of strip lashes on my head. I mean, I don’t think that Lisa nor other celebrated makeup artists would do that…